Picture Day

So I started this little project as a way to document adventure...but it really has turned into a sounding board for all the embarrassing, awkward, and slightly pathetic things that happen to me. These are my stories (dundun). Here is a pathetic little gem to make you chuckle, I have to laugh at it too...
Every few years our church puts out a new photo directory, pictures of the families, contact information, etc. As I was signing up to have my picture taken for our directory I had the following conversation with one of the older women who were manning the sign up table
Woman: "Are you going to be taking your photo all by yourself?"
Me: "Yes"
Woman: "Do you have a pet, like a dog or a kitty or something you want to have in the photo with you?"
Me: "Nope, it's just me"
Woman: "Well, it won't always be, dear."

Really?

Seriously?

Oh! What a (not so) Beautiful Morning...

I've been house-sitting for the past few days, and it's been really nice to have a place to myself, about an hour away from my folks' house. Well...that is until this morning. When I locked myself out of the house. In my nightgown.

I went out to give the doggies their breakfast, and apparently, the back door automatically locked behind me. Beautiful. Now I'm in my nightie, my phone is inside, and I don't know ANYONE in Fresno. So I did the only logical thing I could think of. I hopped the gate so I could be in the front yard. I waited until someone came jogging by, flagged him down, and asked if I could use his cell phone (now, if my life were a TV show, he would have been cute and in his mid-to-late twenties; but because this is my life and not Rachel Green's, he was in his 40s and kinda gross). Then I did what I always do in a crisis. I called my mommy since her's is one of the few numbers I actually have memorized...and she used to work with the mother/mother-in-law of the people whose dogs I'm watching. I asked her to call her friend to come rescue me somehow...

Then, I hopped the gate again and waited. And waited. And threw the ball around for the dogs. And waited. And then my beautiful sister (whom I love dearly) begrudgingly came by with the key so I could finally (after two and a half hours) get back in the house.

Does this stuff actually happen to other people? Or is it just me? Cause if it's just me, then other people are totally missing out on feeling like constant screw-ups!

How much is that doggy in the window?

I want a dog. I can't have pets in my apartment, and I can't barely take care of myself, let alone another living thing...but I really want a dog.

Just for kicks, I decided to go on the Ventura County animal rescue site...I'm not sure why I did this, but I found a new way of torturing my self. Looking at adoptable animals that need homes when I can't be the one to give them that. Luckily, VCAR is a no-kill shelter, so none of these puppies are in danger, but shelter life can't be fun, and my heart is breaking that I can't give loving homes to all these adorable mutts.I mean who can say 'no' to this little lady?

Don't you just want to take her home and love her? I want to cuddle this puppy and give her a name (she doesn't have one, yet) and a bath and a place to call home.

I'm not sure when it happened, but I am such a softie when it comes to dogs.

Through the river and over the woods...

It has been raining here for, like, a week straight! The sun finally came out today, and it was beautiful!! (I was secretly hoping for a double rainbow, but the rain stopped shortly after the sun came out...) I've never seen rain like this before, it was incredible!! A little ridiculous, but mostly incredible!!
The next few days are supposed to be sunny, or at least not rainy, for the next few days...but I'm not going to be here. I'm flying to my grandma's for Christmas...the best part is going to be the 4 adults in a Prius road tripping from the Sac airport to grandma's house...and I can't WAIT!! Mostly because my family is CRAZY!!!. First off, 16 people over for Christmas. 5 cousins, 2 aunts, 2 uncles, 3 dogs, 2 cats, 1 step-cousin, 1 cousin-in-law, 2 parents, 1 sister and a grandma who says and does things mostly because she's old and no one is going to say anything back. I will give an example: My grandma came in September and tried to give me money. I told her no. I refused to take it. So what did grandma do? She stuffed it down my shirt!!...yes, apparently, my grandma thinks I'm a stripper. She also says stuff like "Because you'll want to go to church on Christmas eve, I should probably start going again so they remember what I look like there." Oh, grandma...
I am so ready for this crazy to happen!! Bring it on, Christmas, bring it on!!!

But first, I should probably pack!


The picture I'm sending with all my Christmas cards next year...I hope your Christmas is as awkward as mine!!

Puppy Love

I am a dog person. I discovered this fairly late in life, since my family didn't own a dog until my senior year of high school. We'd been thinking about getting a dog for a while. With a 17 year old and a 14 year old, my parents figured we could handle the responsibility. Rats, bunnies and fish are one thing...but a dog was a huge undertaking. My dad was very strict about the fact that the dog would not be his. Said dog wouldn't be allowed on the furniture or the carpet. Originally he wanted it to be an outside dog, but conceded to let it sleep in the laundry room with a baby gate up. He would not walk the dog, or feed the dog. He wasn't necessarily an advocate for getting a family pet.
This makes it sound like my dad hates dogs. He really doesn't. I was really baffled by all of that. He was always telling my sister and I about fond memories of his dog growing up, Hildaguard the St. Bernard. I couldn't understand why he was being so down on this dog thing.
Anyway, one Saturday my mom went to the farmer's market to procure some produce, and the SPCA had brought some of the cutest and most adoptable dogs (and cats too, I'm sure...but who wants a cat??). My mom saw this one little terrier mix with a docked tail and it was all over (the dog my mom had growing up also had a docked tail). She called the fam down to approve, papers were signed and we were the proud owners of the cutest terrier mutt known to man-kind. She was our dog!!
In no time at all she was hanging out on furniture and in carpeted parts of the house. My dad treated her like a third child, and talked baby talk to her. He loved walking her. Yes, as down as he was on getting a dog, that's how much he ended up loving our Kylie.
When it came time for us to take a vacation, we had to decide what to do with our baby. My parents heard of a really sweet kennel, and we took her there! She loved it, it was like doggie camp. Anyway, as a Christmas present or whatever they gave us a mug with our dog on it.This really isn't a good picture of her, she kind of looks like she's being strangled by the kennel guy. Here is a better one I think I was trying to take her to college with me, which is why she is in a box.

Sadly, Kylie passed away about two years ago while I was away working at summer camp. She was not the best behaved or smartest dog, but she is definitely missed!